(Gordon`s story March 2006)
Although I`ve been a Christian for 22 years and have experienced many blessings in the Lord Jesus Christ, I faced my biggest battle yet, when, last July, after a long period of stress at work, I was diagnosed with depression. As a mental health worker I certainly knew a lot about the devastating affects of depression on someone`s life. The obvious questions began to circulate in my mind. “What`s happening to me? Why me? Where is God when I need him most?” It was like being in a long, dark tunnel with no sign of light at the other end yet in a strange way this whole experience has brought me closer to God. He led me in a wonderful journey of discovery through his word and the promises in his word. I discovered that God has promised to work in all circumstances for the good of those who love him and that he has a purpose for all of us(Romans 8:28). I just Praise his name for that. Another thing I want to Praise God for is the tremendous support I receive from the Fellowship at Preston Grange Community Church. Their prayers and support have been part of God`s healing process. Now, 8 months later. I know I have been delivered from depression and have made plans to return to work. PRAISE BE TO GOD!
(Paul`s story)
My childhood was not an easy one, I was born in 1943 in a market town called Morpeth, Northumberland. My father was called away for service in the army. As with most families at the time, there were many hardships. My mother, who had rejected her strict Brethren upbringing years before, couldn`t take it, and turned to drink. She had been very young when she married, and the realities of married life, and being the mother of three young children, proved to be too much. Both my Father and Mother became involved with other people. It was apparently the normal scene for strange men to visit our house. One time when I was an infant, a neighbour took me to her home because I was not receiving the care I needed from my Mother. It was not long afterwards that my two sisters were taken away as well, and we were separated from then on.
As the years went by, I grew very bitter towards my Mother. I could not understand how someone could leave her children the way she had done, particularly a baby. With this chip on my shoulder you can imagine the kind of person I became. Like many small people I was aggressive by nature, willing to do almost anything to step on anyone, to get to wherever I was trying to go. Because of my bitterness I was not a nice person to know.
In my youth I was a choirboy in the Anglican Church, but only because I was paid! During my playtime at school I would collect hawthorn berries to sell. I delivered meat, papers, milk, paraffin etc, and worked in a darkroom for a while. At school I had quite a little business selling aniseed balls and individual Polo mints at a high profit. I made quite a lot of money and thought I was rich. I was smoking quite heavily at ten years of age and soon realised that there was money to be made selling individual cigarettes at 2½ pence each. Money was fast becoming my god and was convinced that people were judged by what they were worth. It was important to me to be seen with rich people.
Going to the city of Newcastle, I worked my way through a hairdressing apprenticeship. As a result of mostly telling lies, I got into the best salons and by the age of 22 I was a manager and my income was the highest I could get in the North of England.
By this time I had met and married Jeanne. You can imagine what kind of problems I brought into my marriage. It was the first time in my life that I had known any kind of physical affection and that I knew someone really cared for me. When we had been married for four years, our daughter, Clare, was born. Though I loved my wife very much, I found I was jealous over the time and love our little baby was receiving.
My wife had quite a traumatic caesarian delivery and resulted in severe depression following the birth. I was so bound up in my own feelings of rejection that I was totally oblivious to how she felt. Instead of trying to sort through our difficulty, I turned to drink. It was something I felt I could lean on. I began to mix with the `big time guys` who had everything going for them, in the worldly sense. They could attract the girls with a snap of the finger and money spoke louder than words.
My drinking increased and I started going out at 10.30pm spending most of the night
on the booze. I visited places where there were `lock-
As my wallet grew thinner, my wonderful drinking partners disappeared, looking for
someone else willing to foot the bill! There I was, stuck in the house on my own,
and so lonely. Eventually, I stopped drinking, but I found I didn`t want to wake
up in the morning. I felt, somehow, that I had to show my wife and daughter how much
I loved them and that they were far more important to me than these other people,
who had stolen my attention. The vows I made at our wedding meant a lot to me. Jeanne
was smoking heavily and not eating properly. She was seeing a psychiatrist and was
taking tranquillisers and anti-
In 1975 I was invited by a man who lived near the place where I worked, to go to a series of meetings called `Come alive in 75`. I went to a Baptist Church, where these people shared testimony. They spoke boldly of how God changed their lives. There was also a singing group and it was the most `heavenly sound` I had ever heard. I remember thinking”If only my mates could see me sitting here on a Saturday night, they would wonder what was going on.” At the end of the meeting they asked those who wanted to invite Jesus into their lives to come to the front. Something was pulling me, but I did not understand it, and certainly wasn`t going to do what he said, which was, “Stand up and come forward.”
After this series of meetings had finished, there were others. In 1976 there was
an American opera singer who performed a concert. One song in particular spoke to
me. It was, “Because he lives I can face tomorrow, because he lives all fear is gone....”
I knew I needed what the others had but did not know what to do about it. I felt
as though everyone was watching me but nevertheless I knew I just had to go forward.
That evening I committed my life to Jesus Christ. It was the most beautiful experience
of my life. I felt at peace, was filled with the love of Jesus-
Following the meeting, I hurried home to tell Jeanne, “You`ll never guess what`s happened to me. It`s great! I want to tell you about this guy Jesus. He`s fantastic!” Jeanne was watching T.V. When I came Bounding in so excitedly. She thought, “Oh, something new! In six weeks it will be finished.” You see, I was the sort of person who was always wildly enthusiastic about new things for about....six weeks. If it happened to be fishing, I would have all the best equipment. After a short period I`d lose interest and not mention it again. However, this was different. I got a Bible, which I still read. It is the living Word of God and contains an answer to every problem. My first real prayer was that my family would be united in Jesus Christ.
Some time later, while I was in a church service, God spoke to me clearly. “You must be reconciled to your mother. I want you to love your mother.” I found this hard, in the light of what she had done, but in the end I relented and agreed.
It was November, and I knew that my mother would be at a particular farm for Christmas. As we were leaving the house one day, I said to my wife, “I`ve got to go and see my mother.” Knowing how I felt about my mother, Jeanne nearly fell down the steps. When I actually saw my mother, all I felt was pity. Suddenly, I could understand all her actions. I understood her problem with drinking because I too had been there.
I forgave my mother that day, just as Jesus had forgiven me. I learned a lesson that
I will never forget -
I give God all the glory for what He has done!
June’s story -
I was brought up in a Christian household, baptized as a baby and confirmed as a teenager. I was married in the church I attended regularly with my Dad, and lived abroad with my husband for a number of years. Sadly my Dad died a year after I went abroad. I found that very difficult to come to terms with, because he was only in his 50’s. Eventually I attended church again but only on and off.
In 2005 my husband left me after 40 years of marriage and the next day my mother died. My world was shattered. What I prayed for then, didn’t happen but I did receive amazing understanding, love and support from my family, friends and neighbours during this dark time in my life.
In 2007 I went with some friends to an Open Day at our local Community Centre and was given a leaflet with details of Preston Grange Community Church and the services held there. I was told I would be very welcome if I attended. I put the leaflet on my bookcase and somehow it kept catching my eye every time I passed it, so I read it properly. It took 3 more weeks before I plucked up the courage to go. I was made very welcome but felt foolish because all I did was weep silently through the first services I attended and hurried away afterwards. However, I continued to go and was glad to stay afterwards for a cup of tea with everyone. I began to look forward to Sunday worship and the loving fellowship there. I attend every week now.
God was responsible for all the understanding, love and support I received. He gave me what I needed and not what I had prayed for. He has been through all my unhappiness with me, filled me with joy and brought me back to Him.
In February 2009 I was Baptized. Thank you Lord!